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- Feed a fever, starve a cold. Lightly sup with rickets.
- Takayuki Ikkaku, Arisa Hosaka and Toshihiro Kawabata, Animal Crossing: Wild World, 2005
- Not every story has explosions and car chases. That's why they have nudity and espionage.
- Bill Barnes and Gene Ambaum, Unshelved, 09-14-08
- Like I always say, there's no 'I' in "team". There is a 'me', though, if you jumble it up.
- David Shore, House M.D., DNR, 2004
- Great part of being a grownup, you never have to do anything.
- Peter Blake, House M.D., Safe, 2006
- You talk to God, you're religious. God talks to you, you're psychotic.
- Doris Egan, House M.D., House vs. God, 2006
- Rational arguments don't usually work on religious people. Otherwise, there wouldn't be religious people.
- Doris Egan, House M.D., The Right Stuff, 2007
- I'm a jerk to everyone. Best way to protect yourself from lawsuits.
- David Hoselton, House M.D., Guardian Angels, 2007
- Lies are like children: they're hard work, but it's worth it because the future depends on them.
- Pam Davis, House M.D., It's A Wonderful Lie, 2008
- A good relationship is like fireworks: loud, explosive, and liable to maim you if you hold on too long.
- Jeph Jacques, Questionable Content, 11-14-08
- There are two ways to pass a hurdle: leaping over or plowing through... There needs to be a monster truck option.
- Jeph Jacques, Questionable Content #1356, 03-10-09
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