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- Perhaps, after all, America never has been discovered. I myself would say that it had merely been detected.
- Oscar Wilde (1854 - 1900), The Picture of Dorian Gray, 1891
- If the world should blow itself up, the last audible voice would be that of an expert saying it can't be done.
- Peter Ustinov (1921 - 2004)
- The prospect of a long day at the beach makes me panic. There is no harder work I can think of than taking myself off to somewhere pleasant, where I am forced to stay for hours and 'have fun'.
- Phillip Lopate
- To be stupid, selfish, and have good health are three requirements for happiness, though if stupidity is lacking, all is lost.
- Gustave Flaubert (1821 - 1880)
- I hate mankind, for I think myself one of the best of them, and I know how bad I am.
- Joseph Baretti, quoted in Boswell's Life of Samuel Johnson
- All men are frauds. The only difference between them is that some admit it. I myself deny it.
- H. L. Mencken (1880 - 1956)
- The movies are the only business where you can go out front and applaud yourself.
- Will Rogers (1879 - 1935)
- You can't make up anything anymore. The world itself is a satire. All you're doing is recording it.
- Art Buchwald (1925 - 2007)
- Anyone who works is a fool. I don't work - I merely inflict myself upon the public.
- Robert Morley
- Everyone thinks of changing the world, but no one thinks of changing himself.
- Leo Tolstoy (1828 - 1910)
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