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- Competence, like truth, beauty and contact lenses, is in the eye of the beholder.
- Laurence J. Peter (1919 - 1988), The Peter Principle (1969), chapter 1
- You can tell a lot about a fellow's character by his way of eating jellybeans.
- Ronald Reagan (1911 - 2004), quoted in Observer, March 29 1981
- My fellow Americans, I am pleased to tell you I just signed legislation which outlaws Russia forever. The bombing begins in five minutes.
- Ronald Reagan (1911 - 2004), Said during a radio microphone test, 1984
- Aristotle maintained that women have fewer teeth than men; although he was twice married, it never occurred to him to verify this statement by examining his wives' mouths.
- Bertrand Russell (1872 - 1970), Impact of Science on Society (1952) ch. 1
- For every person who wants to teach there are approximately thirty people who don't want to learn--much.
- W. C. Sellar and R. J. Yeatman, And Now All This (1932) introduction
- I have been thinking that I would make a proposition to my Republican friends... that if they will stop telling lies about the Democrats, we will stop telling the truth about them.
- Adlai E. Stevenson Jr. (1900 - 1965), Speech during 1952 Presidential Campaign
- A diplomat... is a person who can tell you to go to hell in such a way that you actually look forward to the trip.
- Caskie Stinnett, Out of the Red (1960)
- Eternity's a terrible thought. I mean, where's it all going to end?
- Tom Stoppard (1937 - ), Rosencrantz and Guildenstern are Dead (1967)
- Famous remarks are very seldom quoted correctly.
- Simeon Strunsky (1879 - 1948), No Mean City (1944)
- A bore is a man who, when you ask him how he is, tells you.
- Bert Leston Taylor, The So-Called Human Race (1922)
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