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- Happiness is the perpetual possession of being well deceived.
- Jonathan Swift (1667 - 1745)
- You never realize how short a month is until you pay alimony.
- John Barrymore (1882 - 1942)
- ...Then anyone who leaves behind him a written manual, and likewise anyone who receives it, in the belief that such writing will be clear and certain, must be exceedingly simple-minded...
- Plato (427 BC - 347 BC), _Phaedrus_
- It's silly to go on pretending that under the skin we are all brothers. The truth is more likely that under the skin we are all cannibals, assassins, traitors, liars, hypocrites, poltroons.
- Henry Miller (1891 - 1980)
- Brevity is the soul of lingerie.
- Dorothy Parker (1893 - 1967)
- A poet more than thirty years old is simply an overgrown child.
- H. L. Mencken (1880 - 1956)
- The husband who wants a happy marriage should learn to keep his mouth shut and his checkbook open.
- Groucho Marx (1890 - 1977)
- Love is the triumph of imagination over intelligence.
- H. L. Mencken (1880 - 1956)
- You can fool too many of the people too much of the time.
- James Thurber (1894 - 1961)
- Thank heavens the sun has gone in, and I don't have to go out and enjoy it.
- Logan Pearsall Smith (1865 - 1946)
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