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- I do not care to belong to a club that accepts people like me as members.
- Groucho Marx (1890 - 1977)
- The Irish are a fair people - they never speak well of one another.
- Samuel Johnson (1709 - 1784)
- A Sunday school is a prison in which children do penance for the evil conscience of their parents.
- H. L. Mencken (1880 - 1956)
- Posterity is as likely to be wrong as anybody else.
- Heywood Broun (1888 - 1939)
- There is nothing wrong with sobriety in moderation.
- John Ciardi (1916 - 1986)
- Living in California adds ten years to a man's life. And those extra ten years I'd like to spent in New York.
- Harry Ruby
- Humanity is not a gift of nature, it is a spiritual achievement to be earned.
- Richard Bach
- Hope in reality is the worst of all evils, because it prolongs the torments of man.
- Friedrich Nietzsche (1844 - 1900)
- Sex: the thing that takes up the least amount of time and causes the most amount of trouble.
- John Barrymore (1882 - 1942)
- Dinner theater is anti-culture.
- John Simon
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