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- A husband is what's left of the lover once the nerve has been extracted.
- Helen Rowland (1876 - 1950)
- Our best work is done when it needs to be.
- F. Phelps
- Theology is the effort to explain the unknowable in terms of the not worth knowing.
- H. L. Mencken (1880 - 1956)
- If I owned Texas and Hell, I would rent out Texas and live in Hell.
- Philip Sheridan
- Courage is the fear of being thought a coward.
- Horace Smith
- What is virtue but the trades unionism of the married.
- George Bernard Shaw (1856 - 1950)
- Nothing fails like success.
- Gerald Nachman
- Critics are like pigs at the pastry cart.
- John Updike (1932 - )
- When I hear the word "culture" I reach for my gun.
- Hans Johst (c. 1939)
- College football would be more interesting if the faculty played instead of the students - there would be a great increase in broken arms, legs and necks.
- H. L. Mencken (1880 - 1956)
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