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- The only thing worse than being talked about is not being talked about.
- Oscar Wilde (1854 - 1900)
- Happiness is the perpetual possession of being well deceived.
- Jonathan Swift (1667 - 1745)
- If at first you don't succeed, try, try, and try again. Then give up. There's no use being a damned fool about it.
- William Claude Dunkenfield (W. C. Fields)
- The choice before us is plain: Christ or chaos, conviction or compromise, discipline or disintegration. I am rather tired of hearing about our rights and privileges as American citizens. The time is come - it now is - when we ought to hear about the duties and responsibilities of our citizenship. America's future depends upon her accepting and demonstrating God's government.
- Reverend Peter Marshall, on being elected Chaplain of the U. S. Senate in January 1947
- People ask me if I've ever been called a Nazi. I answer that no one has ever had dreams of being tied down and sexually ravished by someone dressed as a liberal.
- P.J. O'Rourke
- 'Virtual Reality' is a name being slapped on almost anything these days, especially if it's lame.
- Mark Hamilton
- Dear Lord, I've been asked, nay commanded, to thank Thee for the Christmas turkey before us... a turkey which was no doubt a lively, intelligent bird... a social being... capable of actual affection... nuzzling its young with almost human- like compassion. Anyway, it's dead and we're gonna eat it. Please give our respects to its family...
- Berke Breathed, Bloom County Babylon
- Nothing in the entire universe ever perishes, believe me, but things vary, and adopt a new form. The phrase "being born" is used for beginning to be something different from what one was before, while "dying" means ceasing to be the same. Though this thing may pass into that, and that into this, yet the sums of things remains unchanged.
- Ovid (43 BC - 17 AD), Metamorphoses
- If you sincerely desire a _truly_ well-rounded education, you must study the extremists, the obscure and "nutty". You need the balance! Your poor brain is already being impregnated with middle-of-the-road crap, twenty-four hours a day, _no matter what_. Network TV, newspapers, radio, magazines at the supermarket... even if you never watch, read, listen, or leave your house, even if you are deaf and blind, the _telepathic pressure alone_ of the uncountable normals surrounding you will insure that you are automatically well- grounded in consensus reality.
- Rev. Ivan Stang - High Weirdness By Mail
- Rosencrantz: Do you think death could possibly be a boat?
Guildenstern: No, no, no...Death is...not. Death isn't. You take my meaning. Death is the ultimate negative. Not-being. You can't not-be on a boat. Rosencrantz: I've frequently not been on boats. Guildenstern: No, no, no - what you've been is not on boats. - Tom Stoppard (1937 - ), "Rosencrantz and Guildenstern are Dead"
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