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- Conservative. noun. A statesman who is enamored of existing evils, as distinguished from a liberal, who wishes to replace them with others.
- Ambrose Bierce (1842 - 1914), The Devil's Dictionary
- You couldn't even prove the White House staff sane beyond a reasonable doubt.
- Ed Meese (1931 - ), on the Hinckley verdict
- Husbands never become good; they merely become proficient.
- H. L. Mencken (1880 - 1956)
- I believe with all my heart that one cannot be America's president without a belief in God, without the strength that your faith gives you.
- George Bush (1924 - ), to convention of National Religious Broadcasters
- America has begun a spiritual reawakening. Faith and hope are being restored. Americans are turning back to God. Church attendance is up. Audiences for religious books and broadcasts are growing. And I do believe that he has begun to heal our blessed land.
- President Ronald Reagan, to the National Association of Evangelicals, Columbus, Ohio
- Fashion is a form of ugliness so intolerable that we have to alter it every six months.
- Oscar Wilde (1854 - 1900)
- All progress is based upon a universal innate desire on the part of every organism to live beyond its income.
- Samuel Butler (1835 - 1902)
- I do not believe in God. I believe in cashmere.
- Fran Lebowitz (1950 - )
- Whosoever shall not fall by the sword or by famine, shall fall by pestilence, so why bother shaving?
- Woody Allen (1935 - ), "Without Feathers"
- It has always been my rule never to smoke when asleep, and never to refrain when awake.
- Mark Twain (1835 - 1910)
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