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- What torture, this life in society! Often someone is obliging enough to offer me a light, and in order to oblige him I have to fish a cigarette out of my pocket.
- Karl Kraus (1874 - 1936)
- When she was a small girl, Amanda hid a ticking clock in an old, rotten tree trunk. It drove woodpeckers crazy. Ignoring tasty bugs all around them, they just about beat their brains out trying to get at the clock. Years later, Amanda used the woodpecker experiment as a model for understanding capitalism, Communism, Christianity, and all other systems that traffic in future rewards rather than in present realities.
- Tom Robbins (1936 - )
- A philosopher once said 'It is necessary for the very existence of science that the same conditions always produce the same results'. Well, they do not. You set up the circumstances, with the same conditions every time, and you cannot predict behind which hole you will see the electron.
- Richard Feynman (1918 - 1988)
- Swat my hind with a mellon rind, That's my penguin state of mind.
- Opus
- Aliter catuli longe olent, aliter sues.
("Puppies and pigs have a very different smell.") - Plautus
- Happiness, noun. An agreeable sensation arising from contemplating the misery of another.
- Ambrose Bierce (1842 - 1914), The Devil's Dictionary
- Bore: a man who is never unintentionally rude.
- Oscar Wilde (1854 - 1900)
- New York is the only city in the world where you can get deliberately run down on the sidewalk by a pedestrian.
- Russell Baker (1925 - )
- It is better to be quotable than to be honest.
- Tom Stoppard (1937 - )
- Men make history, and not the other way around. In periods where there is no leadership, society stands still. Progress occurs when courageous, skillful leaders seize the opportunity to change things for the better.
- Harry S Truman (1884 - 1972)
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