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- Nowadays a citizen can hardly distinguish between a tax and a fine, except that the fine is generally much lighter.
- G.K. Chesterton
- Etymology, n.:
Some early etymological scholars come up with derivations that were hard for the public to believe. The term "etymology" was formed from the Latin "etus" ("eaten"), the root "mal" ("bad"), and "logy" ("study of"). It meant "the study of things that are hard to swallow." - Mike Kellen
- Delores breezed along the surface of her life like a flat stone forever skipping along smooth water, rippling reality sporadically but oblivious to it consistently, until she finally lost momentum, sank, and due to an over- dose of flouride as a child which caused her to suffer from chronic apathy, doomed herself to lie forever on the floor of her life as useless as an appendix and as lonely as a five-hundred pound barbell in a steroid-free fitness center.
- Winning sentence, 1990 Bulwer-Lytton bad fiction contest.
- He marries best who puts it off until it is too late.
- H. L. Mencken (1880 - 1956)
- The first thing I do in the morning is brush my teeth and sharpen my tongue.
- Oscar Levant (1906 - 1972)
- There is no such thing as an underestimate of average intelligence.
- Henry Adams (1838 - 1918)
- The Green Party is like a watermelon - green on the outside and red on the inside.
- Rep. Bill Dannemeyer, R-Fullerton
- The intelligent man finds almost everything ridiculous, the sensible man hardly anything.
- Johann Wolfgang von Goethe (1749 - 1832)
- The human mind treats a new idea the way the body treats a strange protein; it rejects it.
- Biologist P. B. Medawar
- A large section of the intelligentsia seems wholly devoid of intelligence.
- G.K. Chesterton
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