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Quotes of the Day
| Date | Authors Included |
| September 19 | Oscar Levant, Joe Ancis, Francois de La Rochefoucauld, Bernard M. Baruch |
| September 18 | Rita Rudner, Nicholas Chamfort, George Bernard Shaw, William Goldman |
| September 17 | Douglas Adams, Mel Brooks, George Carlin, Steven Wright |
| September 16 | National Lampoon, Oscar Wilde, Sir Richard Steele, Gerald R. Ford |
| September 15 | Henry David Thoreau, Don Marquis, Sir William Drummond, Randy K. Milholland |
| September 14 | Art Spander, Peter Drucker, Samuel Taylor Coleridge, Kingsley Amis |
| September 13 | Mark Twain, Harry S Truman, Charles McCabe, Norman Mailer |
| September 12 | Groucho Marx, Ambrose Bierce, Voltaire, Thomas A. Edison |
| September 11 | Anonymous, Russell Green, Samuel McChord Crothers, H. G. Wells |
| September 10 | Jack Benny, Bill Cosby, Laurence J. Peter, Sam Levenson |
| September 09 | Niels Bohr, Mickey Mouse, Yogi Berra, John F. Kennedy |
| September 08 | W. C. Fields, Will Rogers, George Bernard Shaw, Jack London |
| September 07 | Unknown, Robert Louis Stevenson, Ralph Waldo Emerson, Herbert Hoover |
| September 06 | Woody Allen, Joseph Stalin, Arnold Toynbee, Thomas Jefferson |
| September 05 | Tennessee Williams, Evan Davis, Marie Ebner von Eschenbach, Bob Edwards |
| September 04 | Flip Wilson, Galileo Galilei, P. J. O'Rourke, David M. Ogilvy |
| September 03 | Paula Poundstone, Eric Hoffer, F. Scott Fitzgerald, Blaise Pascal |
| September 02 | Arthur C. Clarke, Marston Bates, Paul Gauguin, Al Boliska |
| September 01 | Samuel Butler, Jules Feiffer, Agatha Christie, Aristotle |
| August 31 | Ronald Reagan, Umberto Eco, Diogenes the Cynic, George Orwell |
| August 30 | Otto von Bismarck, Oscar Wilde, Christopher Hampton, James Madison |
| August 29 | Lenin, Evan Esar, Robertson Davies, Ellen DeGeneres |
| August 28 | Gore Vidal, Unknown, H. L. Mencken, Mark Twain |
| August 27 | Ambrose Bierce, Charles Bukowski, Rita Rudner, W. Somerset Maugham |
| August 26 | Steven Wright, Adlai E. Stevenson Jr., Hobart Brown, Scott Adams |
| August 25 | Groucho Marx, Niels Bohr, Yogi Berra, Demetri Martin |
| August 24 | Charles M. Schulz, Mae West, William Shakespeare, Thomas Pickering |
| August 23 | Bob Edwards, Dorothy Nevill, Vladimir Nabokov, Jerry Seinfeld |
| August 22 | Joseph Heller, Willie Tyler, Paul Valery, Ayn Rand |
| August 21 | David Letterman, Rick Polito, Voltaire, Georg Christoph Lichtenberg |
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