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A friend is someone who will help you move. A real friend is someone who will help you move a body.
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A gentleman is a man who can play the accordion but doesn't.
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A stitch in time would have confused Einstein.
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A wise man can see more from the bottom of a well than a fool can from a mountain top .
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Accident, n.: A condition in which presence of mind is good, but absence of body is better.
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After all is said and done, a lot more will be said than done.
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All power corrupts, but we need the electricity.
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All programmers are playwrights and all computers are lousy actors.
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An effective way to deal with predators is to taste terrible.
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Anarchy - it's not the law, it's just a good idea.
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Antonym, n.: The opposite of the word you're trying to think of.
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Any sufficiently advanced bureaucracy is indistinguishable from molasses.
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Anyone who uses the phrase 'easy as taking candy from a baby' has never tried taking candy from a baby.
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Artificial Intelligence is no match for natural stupidity.
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Barnum was wrong - it's more like every 30 seconds.
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Cats are intended to teach us that not everything in nature has a function.
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Don't use a big word where a diminutive one will suffice.
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Don't worry if you're a kleptomaniac, you can always take something for it.
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Eat a live toad the first thing in the morning and nothing worse will happen to you the rest of the day.
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Every big problem was at one time a wee disturbance.
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Showing quotations 1 to 20 of 54 total.
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