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PostPosted: Thu Sep 08, 2005 7:00 pm 
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Why does this all have to be so confusing?!

Why can't I just walk away and forget this ever happened?

Why did I ever fall in love with him in the first place?

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Life without chocolate would be darkness and chaos.
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PostPosted: Thu Sep 08, 2005 7:22 pm 
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Why does this all have to be so confusing?!


It is always confusing in the beginning. Life! is confusing, but it will mull itself over in a little while. It will all become clear, as if some kind of light bursts into flames in your mind. Take some time to just sit down and think about it by yourself. I know you have probably been doing this already, but I had to sit and think about it for awhile until it finally dawned up on me.

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Why can't I just walk away and forget this ever happened?


I was with my ex for nine months, and it took me almost two years to get over it, and actually be able to talk to him again. (You may be different than me here, so don't take this to heart as if it happens to everyone.) The pain will eventually go away, but you will never forget. You will always remember. You are sixteen? As life goes on you will slowly drift away from all of this. You may not want to believe me now, but in time you will see.

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Why did I ever fall in love with him in the first place?


Never regret those you have loved and given your love to. I do not regret what love I have given. I might not be happy with the outcome, but everyone diserves to be loved. We are only human, and we make mistakes. Some are bigger than others, but that should not stop one from being loved.

Raven

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PostPosted: Thu Sep 08, 2005 7:59 pm 
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I want to forget now. It may be gone in 2 years, but until then?

This is hell. I can't do it.

He is so cruel. He won't even tell me why. I wish I could hate him. i wish i could. i have tried and i cant.

What do I do until it all goes away?

Maybe if I would have looked away when he first came over, none of this ever would have heppened. My heart wouldn't be broken. I should have looked away.

Why didn't I?

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Life without chocolate would be darkness and chaos.
~truckernun


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PostPosted: Thu Sep 08, 2005 11:31 pm 
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Did you ever think that maybe things went the way they did because they could go no other way? When I lost the girl I was talking about in my other post; I felt just like you. It was absolutely horrible. But as time passed you know what I realized? I learned some of the greatest lessons about relationships, love, and women because of her. And they have all been lessons that I have seriosuly taken to heart. I think because of my lose I have gained quite a leap in relationship maturity. I know now that I will be able to catch all the stupid little things that seem to snow ball in a relationship and lead to an end. I know how to treat the girl I love alot better then I did previously. I learned ALOT, and the next girl that happens to come my way, will hopefully be very happy to be with such an understanding guy (Ok, I'm boasting kinda...hehe, but I seriously feel so much more confident in being able to make a relationship work great, and become something wonderful) Maybe you will realize you've learned alot too from this...just remember experience can hurt like crazy when it comes to love, but it is also the best teacher. I wish I could say more, because I feel like there is something more I could say that you would want to hear trucker, but I am having some writers block. I'll try to work on it and post later. Don't lose hope, and don't go crawling back.

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PostPosted: Fri Sep 09, 2005 2:57 am 
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"A life without love may have no thorns but a life without love will have no roses"

"I hold true, whatever befalls, I feel it when I sorrow most It is better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all."

Alfred Lord Tenyson.

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PostPosted: Fri Sep 09, 2005 4:23 am 
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Quote:
What do I do until it all goes away?


Live life! Go about what you have to do. Do other things. Try new things.

Quote:
Maybe if I would have looked away when he first came over, none of this ever would have heppened. My heart wouldn't be broken. I should have looked away.

Why didn't I?


"Everything happens for a reason, no matter how good or bad the outcome."

It also teaches us lessons that we may not have learned in any other way.

Quote:
I wish I could hate him. i wish i could. i have tried and i cant.


You should never hate anyone. Dislike them, yes!, but hate them, no!

Raven

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~Verin (The Wheel of Time)


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PostPosted: Fri Sep 09, 2005 4:48 am 
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Yeah I learned alot.

But, God, why did it have to end this way?

I have to move on. I have to. I won't go back. He was unhappy with me. And all I want is for Him to be happy. And he wasn't with me. So I have to move on. But I don't know how.

I try getting involved in different things. But EVERYTHING I do leads me back to Him. How can I move on when everything takes me right back to Him?



I talked to Him last night. Argued is more like it. 45 mintues. And He yelled at me. He yelled. So I got off the phone and cried myself to sleep.



I have to convince myself everything is ok. When I tell myself that, is sorta is. I can eat. I can sleep (a little). What can I do to convince myself everything is ok???

~The lost little girl~

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PostPosted: Fri Sep 09, 2005 3:32 pm 
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I try getting involved in different things. But EVERYTHING I do leads me back to Him. How can I move on when everything takes me right back to Him?


I wont get really detailed on this...I really didn't want to from the beginning, but I will do it for the sake of giving an example.

My Ex hurt me really bad. It took me forever to see this and leave him. I wouldn't listen to anyone. This was only 2 years ago. I still can't forget what he did to me, but now I am trying to figure out what I am missing. Everything I do seems to be leading back to him. Everywhere I go carries a memory with him in it. It's like I can't get away, and I don't know what I am searching for. Now, he is in prison for 20 years, and I feel some sort of relief, some sort of final sever with the tie that wouldn't let me go.

What you need is the truth, and only the truth can set you free. I do not believe that he was unhappy with you, and if he was...I don't think it was your fault. Don't blame yourself, thats what he wants you to do just so he doesn't have to feel guilty. Just so he doesn't have to feel as if he has to blame himself for whatever he did wrong, or was doing wrong.

Do not go to him for the answer darlin. The answer is in yourself. You can find someone so much better now that you have learned the lessons you have. Appreciate what you still have...you still have life, and you need to live it.

I don't know if this will help you, but I know it helps me. Go out in the woods, if there are any where you are. Some place where you can find peace away from people and civilization. Just sit and calm yourself. Look around and take in the baeuty of everything around you. Feel it if you can, the life that it gives and know that it also flows through you.

One other thing I can suggest is to listen to some upbeat music. Dance your heart away girl. It helps release tension.

Raven :wink:

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"You must learn there is a time to speak all of the truth, and a time to govern your tongue."
~Verin (The Wheel of Time)


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PostPosted: Fri Sep 09, 2005 4:10 pm 
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Sorry for making you get into that. Didn't mean to do that.

I'm not going back. I'm trying to close the door. Its just hard. All of my plans and dreams and everything left with him so I am trying to find my life again. but its hard.

I haven't cried today though. :-) Yay! Record!

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Life without chocolate would be darkness and chaos.
~truckernun


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PostPosted: Sat Sep 10, 2005 11:40 am 
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yup everything heals with time! :D just try staying positive and optimistic..u might still rem. him but u won't be sad abt it anymore! put it in ur mind and it can happen :)

Rana

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'One word frees us of all the weight and pain of life: That word is love.'
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PostPosted: Sat Sep 10, 2005 4:44 pm 
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Sorry for making you get into that. Didn't mean to do that.

That's okay! I think I needed to get that off my chest anyways. It's been bothering me ever since I realized it. Your comment just helped me let loose about it a little. So Thank You!

Raven :wink:

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"You must learn there is a time to speak all of the truth, and a time to govern your tongue."
~Verin (The Wheel of Time)


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PostPosted: Sat Sep 10, 2005 8:04 pm 
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Rana, I dont know whether time does it or not. All I know is that I tell myself that everything is ok and that is doesn't hurt and that I am fine. If I do that, no matter what I feel, I can eat and sleep and function.


And to all of you....
Seriously...I don't know where I'd be without you. Its really great to have 500 shoulders to cry on and nobody hates me for it. Thanks.



And a personal thanks to Raven and nirvana666. I owe you both really big.


~~~I wish life wasnt this hard all the time~~~

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Life without chocolate would be darkness and chaos.
~truckernun


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PostPosted: Mon Sep 12, 2005 12:52 pm 
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So I just talked to my best friend.

Her boyfriend of two years just dumped her. Said the exact same things my boyfriend said. And another one of our good friends..... HER boyfriend of 2 years just broke up with her! Said the same stuff!

WHAT IS UP WITH THIS?

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Life without chocolate would be darkness and chaos.
~truckernun


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PostPosted: Mon Sep 12, 2005 6:00 pm 
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I don't know...perhaps men are on a roll this year in creating heart breaks. It seems that men nowadays have lost touch with the true meaning of a relationship and what you have to do to keep it going. What do you think?

Raven

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"You must learn there is a time to speak all of the truth, and a time to govern your tongue."
~Verin (The Wheel of Time)


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PostPosted: Mon Sep 12, 2005 9:22 pm 
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I think we're both guilty Raven, Men and Women. I know guys that are sorry saps when it comes to relationships. And I know girls that are too. Personally I blame it on media and lifestyle in general just plain bombarding us with things involving love. Everyone is always questioning their realationships. "Is everything going the way it should go?" "Are they cheating on me?" "Could I do better?"Which is normal, but is seems no one is sure what they want anymore because they have so many different contradicting ideals inplanted in them. Relationships have gone from the feeling of love and the want of a companion, to all kinds of various requirements that we think are essential.

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Join the company of lions rather then the lead amoung foxes.

Don't show me the palm tree, show me the dates.


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