Quotations and Literature Forum

During the course of a typical day someone will ask; "How are you doing?"
HOW? Like maybe they want to know if my hemorhroids are itching. (Why? Am I clawing my buttox in public agagin?) Typically I will say that I feel as strong as seasoned hickory BUT I detest such simple questions. I aim to start repsonding with "Who are you doing" rather than HOW are you doing. HOW would YOU respond if someone asked you; Who are you doing? (The Secretary? I wish!) Who am I doing??? HuH? This is called "shock effect" leading question.

One of my favorite leading questions is; Have you heard anything intelligent lately? Most people will think about for a full second and then respond with a simple "no." Have I heard anything intelligent lately? Why yes, the last time that I opened my mouth.

"Yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery, today is a gift, that's why they call it the present."

I like "can you hold?" and I say "hold on to what?"

Grumpy: Ask her who she is, and what she's doing here!
Doc: Ah, yes. What are you, and who are you doing here?
~Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs
http://www.filmsite.org/snow2.html
http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/tg/st ... 55-6939146

PREMIERE: If Nathan's doing Barbara Bush, who are you doing?
Williams: Oh God. Not gonna say it. Not gonna go there. [Looks at Lane] Are you really doing Barbara Bush?
http://premieremag.radicalmedia.com/arc ... /birdcage/

Who are you doing?
http://www.angelfire.com/me/kingofmedia/page3.html

About 11:00 a.m. (central time) I called a guy who previously worked for the agency that I work for. He is now employed as an accountant with a higher paying salary. When I introduced myself on the telephone he asked me, "How's it shaking?" He caught me off guard so I said that I would have to give it some thought.

We had lunch and I am still tying to come up with a good repsonse to such a question. How's it SHAKING?

Stream of consiousness--things that shake?

1) Jello
2) Paint mixing machine
3) Milk shaker
4) Hands
5) Earth Quakes
6) tamborine
7) leaves? BINGO!
9) Martins? GINKO!

Terms about shaking.

Shaking like a leaf?
(I,m shaking like a leaf.)
Shaken but stirred?
(I'm shaken but not stirred.)
Shake it but don't break it?
Shake hands with me?
Shake it for me?
Let's shake it down.
Let's shake it up.
Let's shake it sideways. Bingo!

How's it shaking? SIDEWAYS

I like any normal person in their early 20's is probably going through the whole transition of what to do with our lives. Well when speaking with my advisor, I was kindly and seriously asked "What do you want to be when you grow up?" Like a mother would ask to her 5-year-old child when toying with the idea of what her creation will ammount to. Baffled I asked her "What do you want to be?", then walked out...what a weird question! What do I want to be???

That was really a cute and sassy way to respond to your advisor. You get my vote of confidence. Lay some more feline wisdom on us.

When I was 9 years old I said that I wanted to grow up to be a Forest Ranger. Why? I said that I wanted to wear a green uniform and drive a green truck around so I would look important.

When I was a wee little girly poo, I wanted to be a doctor and marry a man then move to France and buy a castle. Wow, what an imagination I HAD!!! Now, I am a second year freshman in a college that I hate, and bitterly single might I add. Amazing how a vivid imagination can create such disappointment! You cannot depend on your eyes when your imagination is out of focus.
Mark Twain (1835 - 1910)

I am trying to recall a question that I was asked during college by a teacher or an advisor that would qualify as an intelligent question but I am coming up dry. It is not that the teachers were not intelligent but they were more in a posture to answer questions than ask them. During my years at college I was more concerned about getting a degree rather than getting an education. The difficulty of those years was compounded by social demands. When you consider the necessity of experiencing a romantic relationship during college, that necessity can make (or break) the college experience.

I was only single about three months or one quarter during my 5-year stretch and I can recall how miserable I was during that quarter. My grades suffered with me. Just keep your chin up and maintain your equanimity. One day you'll hear the bluebird sing.

When I was little I wanted to be an archeaologist. When I got older, high school maybe, I decided everything of importance must have been found already and there was no sense studying to become an archeaologist anymore. (How silly!!!) So I became a medical technologist instead (even sillier!)
Recently I was telling this story to a friend. His thought on the subject was that it was probably better that I didn't go into archeaology because apparently I give up to easy. The way he figured it, I would have gotten to the dig site, looked around, and said...nope...doesnt look like there is anything here....let's use the grant money and go on vacation!
Maybe he was right but I still think it would have been a cool job.

As of this point I have yet to hear anyone ask any question to which I could come up to an intelligent answer. The absolute worst one yet has been "what did you do today?", i felt like asking what did you do tomorrow, or the day after

phantom: who's that quote by in your first post?

"Yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery, today is a gift, that's why they call it the present."

I can't recall where I discovered this statement but I'll see if I can locate it in my files. It is my custom to put more emphais on the message rather than the source. Most of the "quotes" that I post are proverbs, aphorisms, epigrams or wisdom or wit.

The quieter you become, the more you are able to hear.
--Baba Ram Dass

Everything has beauty but not everyone sees it.
--Confucius

Common sense is not so common.
--Voltaire

Let the beauty of what you love be what you do.
--Rumi

Learning is movement from moment to moment.
--Krishnamurti

Kind words can be short and easy to speak, but their echoes are truly endless.
--Mother Teresa

Do it big, do it right, and do it with style.
--Fred Astaire

Make haste slowly
--Zen Master

It is not the answer that enlightens but the question.
--Eugene Ionesco

Your work is to discover your work and then with all your heart to give yourself to it.
--Buddah

To know that you do not know is the best.
--Lao-tzu

Work is love made visible.
--Kahlil Gibran

Patience is the companion of wisdom.
--St. Augustine


(I located all of these in the book, Office Yoga.)