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PostPosted: Sun Jun 27, 2004 6:56 pm 
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Joined: Tue Jun 22, 2004 11:59 pm
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i wrote this poem in my creative writing class back in college. im not very confident about its literary merit but im posting this one to be butchered on-line. it has been butchered before. im bringing it back to the slaughterhouse:

the sun could shine as long as it wanted to
the sky could turn blue and bleak as it pleases
tomorrows may never come
like a love once lost in a summertime
and hearts could stay broken 'till the end of time.


mushy no?
very elementary..
post yours to be butchered


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PostPosted: Sun Jun 27, 2004 7:07 pm 
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QuoteMaster
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Joined: Mon Jun 09, 2003 3:40 pm
Posts: 117
Location: In a chair at this moment of typing
This is mine...

I had a shoe
It was blue
My hat is too
I have the flu
Boohoo
:mrgreen:

Not one of my best I have to admit. Seriously, I did make a really great sonnet with a friend for English and it was great, however, our teacher never got around to grading or handing them back... I wonder where it is.

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PostPosted: Tue Jun 29, 2004 9:20 am 
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QuoteMaster
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Joined: Wed Apr 03, 2002 3:01 pm
Posts: 806
Location: Jackson, Tennessee
What is the salve that sooths our emotions?
Where is the flame that flickers with passion?
When is the time that we notice no season?
Why is a question not a matter of vision?


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PostPosted: Wed Jun 30, 2004 8:25 am 
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QuoteMaster
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Joined: Wed Apr 03, 2002 3:01 pm
Posts: 806
Location: Jackson, Tennessee
pinay wrote:
the sun could shine as long as it wanted to
the sky could turn blue and bleak as it pleases
tomorrows may never come
like a love once lost in a summertime
and hearts could stay broken 'till the end of time.


This is the essence of despair. (IMO)

As a rule, I do not ponder sad songs or sad poetry. The writing of such a poem can be beneficial to the writer.


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PostPosted: Wed Jul 07, 2004 8:10 am 
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QuoteMaster
QuoteMaster

Joined: Wed Apr 03, 2002 3:01 pm
Posts: 806
Location: Jackson, Tennessee
Oh happy face of men, If love rules Heaven, rule your mind.

--Boeththius, Consolation of Philosophy


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PostPosted: Thu Jul 08, 2004 6:27 am 
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QuoteMaster
QuoteMaster

Joined: Wed Apr 03, 2002 3:01 pm
Posts: 806
Location: Jackson, Tennessee
The night has a thousand eyes and the day but one;
Yet the light of the bright world dies with the dying sun.

The mind has a thousand eyes and the heart but one;
Yet the light of whole life dies when love is done.

--F.W. Bourdillion
--------------------


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PostPosted: Thu Jul 22, 2004 11:10 am 
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Joined: Wed Apr 03, 2002 3:01 pm
Posts: 806
Location: Jackson, Tennessee
Dawn is the Queen of the eastern sky when there are no clouds to shroud her beauty. I have greeted her from the forest and from the lakes. Sometimes she whispers to me in fields of clover. She has bestowed warmth on my body during the coldest mornings of winter. I have embraced her with reserved strength. She has touched me with her sensual hands. I have looked deep into her eyes to absorb her divine beauty into my mind. She has endowed my soul. During the escalating minutes of our romantic interludes I have loved her with the strength of a mighty lion. She has loved more than a thousand men but I am happy to be one of them. When the sun rises above the eastern horizon I see her nakedness for a full minute before she disappears. I have kissed her soft white skin and held her voluptuous breast with callused, earthly hands. Our lips have touched more than once. Her hair is as golden as the noon sun. Her eyes are as blue as the crystal sea. If I were an artist I would paint of her beauty with a brush. But since I am a poet… I offer her mortal words.


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PostPosted: Tue Aug 03, 2004 8:41 pm 
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Joined: Fri Nov 28, 2003 12:36 pm
Posts: 3610
Hi..... the stuff written by Etania and Phantom_Delta......... gr8 work. keep it up......... 8)

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